A 12-step fellowship for the family and friends of compulsive gamblers.

How Cope Compass fits

Gam-Anon is the room for loved ones. People who have watched a partner, parent, or sibling lose money and themselves to gambling, sitting with people who already know the shape of that ache. It works because it is specific.

Cope Compass is what you carry between meetings. Scripts for hard conversations, how to protect joint finances without weaponizing them, the warning signs to learn cold, the line between supporting and enabling. We also build for the person doing the gambling, which means the whole household has a place to land.

Find a Gam-Anon meeting below. Come back here for the rest.

Gam-Anon began in Brooklyn in 1960, modeled on Al-Anon. It is for anyone whose life has been affected by another person’s gambling: spouses, partners, parents, adult children, siblings, close friends. The gambler does not have to be in recovery, does not have to be admitting the problem, does not even have to know the family member is attending. Gam-Anon is its own fellowship, separate from Gamblers Anonymous, with its own meetings, sponsors, and literature. The program teaches detachment with love, the limits of what one person can do for another, financial self-protection, and recovery from the secondary trauma that comes from living alongside compulsive gambling. Meetings are free, anonymous, and most are 12-step in structure.

The Gam-Anon path, in plain English

Gam-Anon adapts the 12 steps for the family side of the experience. These are paraphrased to make the program approachable; Gam-Anon’s own literature is the canonical source.

1. 1

   Admit you cannot control the gambler

   Acknowledge that another person’s gambling is unmanageable for you, and that trying to fix it has cost you something.

2. 2

   Believe a larger thing can help

   Open to the idea that something beyond your own willpower can restore some peace to your life.

3. 3

   Hand it over

   Make a decision to turn your life over to that larger thing, however you understand it.

4. 4

   Take honest inventory

   Look at your own behavior, fears, resentments, and enabling patterns. The gambler is not the only person whose patterns matter here.

5. 5

   Share it with someone

   Admit to yourself, your higher power, and one other person what you found in your inventory.

6. 6

   Become ready to let go

   Become entirely ready to release the patterns and resentments that have been doing harm.

7. 7

   Ask for the release

   Humbly ask the higher power to remove your shortcomings.

8. 8

   List who you have harmed

   Yes, you. Living with compulsive gambling distorts everyone in the household. Make a list of the people you affected and become willing to make amends.

9. 9

   Make amends

   Make amends where possible, except where doing so would cause more harm.

10. 10

    Keep noticing

    Continue daily inventory; promptly admit when you are wrong.

11. 11

    Stay in contact with the larger thing

    Through prayer or meditation, deepen contact with your higher power.

12. 12

    Pass it on

    Carry this message to others affected by gambling, and live the principles in your relationships.

Gam-Anon is not couples counseling and is not a substitute for clinical care, especially after financial trauma. It is a peer fellowship for ongoing support that runs as long as you need it.

Find Gam-Anon by state

We have editorial content for 20 states so far. Each state page links to active meetings, the state council, and the local helpline. More states are added weekly.

• Arizona9 meetings
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• CaliforniaComing soon
• Colorado6 meetings
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• Connecticut11 meetings
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• Florida12 meetings
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• Georgia7 meetings
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• Illinois11 meetings
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• Indiana6 meetings
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• Louisiana5 meetings
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• Massachusetts9 meetings
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• Maryland9 meetings
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• Michigan11 meetings
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• Mississippi5 meetings
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• North Carolina8 meetings
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• New JerseyComing soon
• Nevada18 meetings
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• New York18 meetings
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• Ohio14 meetings
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• Pennsylvania22 meetings
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• Texas12 meetings
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• Virginia8 meetings
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• Washington7 meetings
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Other approaches to recovery

None of these programs is right or wrong. They are different tools. Many people in long-term recovery have used more than one.

Frequently asked